Ranking every Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt Episode

 

Panty and Stocking Season 2 was a mythical thing like Kingdom Hearts 3 and Half-Life 3 that would never come out. But just like Kingdom Hearts 3, the legendary second season of P&S is supposed to come out sometime this year (still no word on Half-Life.) In celebration of that fact and to prepare for it I rewatched the first season and wanted to rank the episodes. 

If you're reading this I presume you know what Panty and Stocking is, but if you don't it's an adult comedy anime about two fallen angels full of vices named Panty and Stocking trying to earn their way back into Heaven by killing ghosts haunting Daten City. The series is famous and infamous for being over the top in its presentation and style, highly raunchy and adult, its incorporation of Western elements alongside more traditional anime elements such as a more "cartoony" art style and animation, Episodes divided into A and B Eps, and more Western character archetypes. 

Most of my reason for enjoying it isn't especially complex, I find the two leads very funny. I don't particularly find toilet humor that funny but I do find sex jokes pretty funny and those are the two most common forms of humor in the series with the latter definitely being more common then the former. But what I think makes Panty and Stocking's humor work so well for me is its commitment to the bit. Panty and Stocking's cartoonish animation complements how everything in its presentation is ridiculously over the top. I do also tend to appreciate series that can incorporate and blend elements of both Western and Eastern culture together. 

Episode Ranking:

26: Episode 10B- "Chuck to the Future": This seems like a pretty popular pick for worst episode of the series. I get WHY  it exists, the creators were homage-ing some Western films. But this episode is just boring to me. I like Panty and Stocking FOR Panty and Stocking and an episode just watching Chuck was always going to be a hard sell for me and there are episodes with parts in them I dislike more then anything in this ep, but this is the only ep that struggles to keep my attention. 

25: Episode 5A- "Raiders of the Nasal Dark": I am pretty sensitive to grossness. Usually P&S doesn't trigger this because it's SO stylized that gross things don't read to my brain as what they represent. That said I don't like grossout humor and this ep is one of the two that are probably the most gross, specifically focused around mucus and jokes about nose-picking. Also I can't really think of any jokes I found funny from it. It's slightly better then the prior just because Panty and Stocking themselves and I like their personalities but in terms of episodes that actually seem like a P&S ep, this is the lowest.

24: Episode 1A- "Excretion Without Honor and Humanity": The other gross ep, this ep strongly features feces which is something even grosser then mucus, though once again the art style is so stylized it doesn't read as feces to my brain. But yeah while this ep has the same problems as 5A it's NOTABLY better, with the grossout only taking only the latter part of the ep. Before that it mostly introduces the characters and has some amusing parts introducing Panty's sex addiction and Stocking's sugar addiction. I also think the grossout has mildly more narrative reason, as the first ep this ep is priming the viewer for what the show will be like and so it shows the most disgusting grossout in the show to tell a potential audience "if the sex or grossness in this ep bothers you, you can stop now." The first ep does really well as a litmus test for whether a potential audience member is going to enjoy the show, though I don't feel it really shows how good the show CAN be, only how extreme the show can be. 

23: Episode 10A- "Inner Brief": Brief for most of the series it the character that suffers the most comedic abuse. I don't find it that funny but it's usually so brief that it doesn't impact my thoughts on other eps, it usually happens in gags that left seconds between the show's usual gags or action sequences. This is an ep that is JUST abusing Brief the entire time and while it's not as unpleasant to me as grossout, it's still not a very fun experience to me. The only other thing to note is it's an episode about shrinking down and going inside someone's body which is a trope in Western Media, another example of the show taking inspiration from Western Media. But that's pretty neutral and doesn't really improve it's ranking. 

22: Episode 12A- "D.C. Confidential": I'm going to be honest the reason I like Panty and Stocking is for Panty and Stocking. I know some people prefer the Daemon Sisters and that seems really strange to me. Like yeah I can enjoy them as villains for the Angel Sisters, but especially after their introduction ep, the Daemon Sisters are not very interesting to me by themselves. They have far more homogenous personalities with each other, no conflict with each other, and no interesting relationships with anyone outside each other and arguably Panty and Stocking. This ep is a clip show ep where the Daemon Sisters recount the events prior to their leader Corset. So it has both the problems of being a clipshow ep and of not actually having the Anarchy Sisters and instead focusing on the, at least to me, less interesting Daemon Sisters. Outside of the Daemon Sister's incestual relations at the end this ep would be entirely forgettable to me. It doesn't have anything I really didn't like as the priors ep did but it's definitely not one I ever go back too unless I was just rewatching the entire series.

21: Episode 4B- "High School Nudical":  So we're moving from the eps where my reviews are broadly negative to broadly positive. This ep still is obviously on the lower end, it doesn't have many memorable gags though I do recall a couple such as mocking the notion of the underwear run being for activism as opposed to immature rebellion or Panty and Stocking making the boys and girls of their school respectively go hearteyes for them. It also has Panty and Stocking being completely oblivious to Garterbelt's barely disguised identity which was amusing enough. In the same vein though it also started the Garterbelt's desires for school age teens. Even for this show and it's extreme presentation, that is pushing good taste a little. 

20: Episode 4A- "The Diet Syndrome": Obviously if Panty and Stocking were going to make an episode about Dieting and Gaining Weight, it was going to be over the top and not sensitive to the topic at all, and in some way it's actually kinda respectful, treating it with the same cartoonishness and ending on Stocking being content with it. It's not a very funny ep by P&S standards to me but there's a couple of funny gags like the famous Panty pulling up Stocking's shirt repeatedly to expose her weight. 4A and 4B are pretty similar in funniness to me, but this episode is a bit more... I mean "wholesome" is not the right word given the show but something in that direction of "leaves me with a good aftertaste."

19: Episode 8A- "Of the Dead": This is another episode that has a rather famous gag, Panty and Stocking smacking down a zombie cat while calling it slurs in English. The episode outside that is a Zombie Movie Parody. Now I have never actually seen a Zombie Movie in my life so maybe it's funnier if you have seen it. If you haven't like me, the ep seems fine. I enjoy the famous gag from it but otherwise it's fairly standard. 

18: Episode 2B- "Sex and the Daten City": I initially had this ep higher but honestly the more I thought about this ep, the more I thought it shouldn't be that high up. While early on there's some funny jokes about being fame, after the halfway point the ep just becomes Panty and Stocking going around the world collecting copies of the sex tape to destroy before Panty slights Stocking and she uploads it anyway. There's not actually that many jokes and the ones that are there are meh. And it's not like there's stuff outside the humor, this is one of the few episodes without an antagonist. The first half is good and I enjoyed it enough to put it here but I couldn't put it any higher. I also read a pretty interesting argument that Panty is out of character this ep, which is kinda on my mind as I rank it.

17: Episode 8B- "1 Angry Ghost": Ever since I first saw the series I remember feeling this was a weaker ep and it's hard to say why exactly. It kinda just felt like another Scanty and Kneesocks plot like the others, this one with a legal theme. The Phoenix Wright parody was fun but rather brief and shallow. I also liked the joke about Panty's stripper Magical Girl transformation being interrupted by the judge angrily only for Panty to ask why a stripper pole is in here otherwise. And I also enjoy the explanation for why Panty and Stocking couldn't have killed Petter as their weapons always make the ghost explode. That said none of the ep sticks out especially compared to other eps for me. P&S has had better Scanty and Kneesocks plots, better parodies, better plots, etc. though it is more consistently enjoyable then 2B

16: Episode 1B- "Death Race 2010": So just as Episode 1A introduced the Comedic Side of Panty and Stocking, the sex jokes, and gross-out, and the comedically vice-filled personalities of Panty and Stocking, Death Race 2010 introduces the action side of the episode, basically being a giant spectacle fest of them chasing down a Ghost that changes between various vehicles over the episode. I can take or leave action sequences in general but Panty and Stocking does have some pretty great ones and there's some funny gags spread through the ep making it an enjoyable "ride" the whole way through. This ep is also very consistent but not outstanding like 8B, but feels slightly more internally unified and purposeful in its place in the season.

15: Episode 10C- "Help! We are Angels": So this is an interesting episode to rank because it's a music video complete with a lot of music references. On some level it feels weird to rank it this "high" but it does have a plot and in some way captures the spirit of Panty and Stocking. I enjoyed the song and felt its lyrics and themes really capture the feel of Panty and Stocking and I feel like the animation fit it well. It also had a t.A.T.u. reference which I was unreasonably excited I understood when I first saw the series. 

14: Episode 11B- "Nothing to Room": So this ep sets itself a hard task, it's just Panty and Stocking waiting for Garterbelt to finish making them a meal, no real plot and barely any progression, just Panty and Stocking chatting with occasionally bits from Brief, Chuck, or Garterbelt. I don't tend to like these kind of eps, and this ep does fall on the lower half of my ranking for me but like I said I do come to Panty and Stocking for Panty and Stocking. In that way this ep, to keep with the food theme, is like getting a main entree with no sides, appetizers or desserts. Like they might have been nice to have, but I did get what I came over giving it a pretty clear place in the middle of the ranking. Panty and Stocking are enjoyable as always, having fun back and forth and having a really interesting conversation where the two wonder if they even want to go back to Heaven at this point. While prior eps had a thing that didn't fully connect to me or in the case of last ep was the disembodied spirit of the series, this ep is the bare essentials, it's what I come to P&S for and nothing else. 

13: Episode 2A- "The Turmoil of the Beehive": This ep is definitely where I really started to get into the series the first time I saw it. It's interesting to compare to 11B, because where I felt Nothing to Room is at the halfway point of the ranking for being the core of P&S and nothing else, 2A is also sorta fitting of that role because it is to me the standard P&S plot. It has what I like about the series in general, the personalities and dynamic of Panty and Stocking, plus a few added on bits. This ep introduces Brief who I enjoy well enough, and it has one of my favorite ghosts in the series in that she has a more developed theme and personality then most with Barbie. This ep feels like vintage P&S to me and while both this and 11B share what I come to the series for without any substantial faults, this ep has that plus a bit more in a fun sidekick and a fun villain.

12: Episode 7B- "The Stripping": This ep involves Panty and Stocking having to make $3 million in 3 days to pay back the damages they caused to the city during their explosive fights with ghosts. The start of this ep has them try and fail at several jobs in amusing ways which I definitely enjoyed. After that they go to a Casino using their Angel Luck to win, and evolves into another Scanty and Kneesocks confrontation. Much as I'm not the World's biggest fan of the Daemon Sisters they're better then any of the Ghosts, and I like the snazzy vibe of this ep, and Panty and Stocking's growing desperation to win as they sell of pieces of the clothes they're wearing to stay in. Casinos as a locale really fit the vibe of Panty and Stocking and the Angels felt really in their element in the eroticized gambles for money there. 

11: Episode 3B- "Pulp Addiction": This episode has a gimmick. Nearly every line is an innuendo. It tells a fairly normal Panty and Stocking plot, except it has a start and end that is a parody of a war movie using sperms trying to enter a woman, and every single line is an innuendo. I have to be honest, this is really up my angle of humor: linguistically clever yet also really immature and juvenile it's sex focus. I especially love that this episode is no slower then most eps, yet innuendo are slipped into every line naturally. That kind of pacing for humor is just as fun for me as it is for plot. I act like a functioning adult but if you wanna know what my immature side is, this ep is really funny to me. 

10: Episode 12B- "Panty + Brief": So moving into the Top 10 we're moving from the good episodes to the 10 great ones. Panty + Brief is the first part of the three part finale. Stocking is accepted back into Heaven without Panty who loses her powers, setting up the climax of the series next episode. This ep is primarily, as the ep title suggests about the relationship of Panty and Brief, including the Aquarium scene, one of the most famous of the series where Panty sees the boy she had always dismissed in a new light unknowingly, and Brief at his absolute best, going from the picked on joke of the series to saving Panty and igniting feelings from her she's never had. Episode 3B is fun but 12B is an episode that contains part of what makes the series what it is. 

9: Episode 9A- "If the Angels Wore Swimsuits": So I know a lot of people are not super into this episode, because the animation is noticeably lesser and it is self-described a beach ep without much greater relevance. But I don't know I've always found this ep really fun. While this is the ep I probably find hardest to explain, I do know it's something about the atmosphere. The way it takes what could be and the series is admits is a mundane plot and imbues it with so much energy exemplifies what I enjoy about P&S's humor, the way it creates a stylistic exaggerated world everything is taken to an extreme. While the last ep has a lot better plot, I feel like this episode feels more like the series to me, capturing its spirit and atmosphere as much as 10C, but with actual plot, action, and jokes as well. 

8: Episode 13B- "Bitch Girls: 2 Bitch": The final episode of the series, after the emotional climax of the series, Panty and Stocking save Heaven and Earth from Corset. It has cool moments for all the heroes, great action and great jokes. In particular I love the joke of Garterbelt's line of "you saved Heaven and some parts of Earth, almost entirely according to plan." This ep would be even higher, but the ending of the ep and the season is a classic Gainax ending meant to be shocking for shocking sake and while I didn't hate it, I didn't enjoy it either, and I kinda hope it's not that important for the next season. Outside the ending, this ep has the benefits of both the prior episodes, and while the ending is rough, I do think it should be higher then them.

7: Episode 7A- "Trans-homers": I have to be honest, I have a pretty limited knowledge of the Transformers franchise, but even with just that knowledge, this episode is great. It's a transformers parody and I love how they recreated so many things I could recognize from the series, and probably more I couldn't. Panty and Stocking occasionally enjoys parodies as a type of humor, as do I, and this is the most in-depth best parody they've done, capturing the tropes of it and imbuing it with P&S spirit. This ep is thoroughly enjoyable in all parts, even moreso then the last few eps which while great overall did have some weaker parts for me. The only real question is what could be above this.

6: Episode 11A- "Once Upon a Time in Garterbelt": Most of this episode is an exploration about Garterbelt and in particular how he got to the way he was. There are a few episodes of Panty and Stocking with very different styles from the normal but I feel like 11A is the only ep that strikes a balance between feeling like Panty and Stocking while also being very different from most episodes. I found Garterbelt's story engaging and cool, and I feel like Panty and Stocking's natural sense of exaggeration felt more natural in the theological story of Garterbelt one of the worst sinners having to go through all of Earth's history to become a righteous advocate for God. Despite still being funny this is an ep I think really shows that P&S does sometimes go into serious topics while still keeping its own style. It feels more authentically P&S then 7A, while being just as distinctive in tone and presentation. 

5: Episode 3A- "Catfight Club": This episode Panty and Stocking get into a fight and temporarily part ways. While I think Episode 1A and 1B make sense to introduce people to the world of Panty and Stocking and there are better episodes of the series, if you asked me to show people one episode of the series to express what Panty and Stocking is and get them interested it would be this one. This is an episode explaining the relationship between the two main characters, it has their hilarious fighting including some of the most famous lines in the series, as well as the sweet way the two reconcile, the way they call each other names at the end playfully expressing the kind of relationship they have. This episode sort of defines what the series is for me, and I like it as much and as thoroughly as 11A but in most ways and in a way that better expresses the series' core feeling. 

4: Episode 6- "Les Diaboliques": Probably the most iconic episode of the series and the episode most often picked for best episode, Episode 6 introduces the Daemon Sisters, rivals to the Anarchy Sisters. Scanty and Kneesocks are easily at their best this episode: threatening, entertaining, with their own Dark version of the Angels Henshin, and fighting them in the best fight scene in the entire series. This episode has something for everyone, Panty and Stocking both have funny lines, Brief both acts as comic relief yet also helps save the day and has the real start of his shipping with Panty, Scanty and Kneesocks are at their best, even background characters get good lines. Beyond that, the ghost has more personality then others, the episode feels P&S yet also with an atmosphere its own just like the plot where Panty and Stocking's world is invaded by this demonic outside force. 3A is great, but it's a kind of great you can appreciate in a vacuum. Episode 6 is an episode that is great on its and even better when built up, the biggest challenge the Anarchy Sisters faced to that point, ideological and personality opposites to them and their victory through Brief foreshadows the end of the series

3: Episode 5B- "Vomiting Point" A rather controversial episode, Vomiting Point is one of the three gross out episodes along with 5A and 1A but unlike them it has a very clear reason to be. 5B tells the story of Terao, an aging saleryman with a banal sad life. For this episode alone almost the entire episode is switched to a more realistic and deliberately ugly art style. The only things in this episode that are still colorful and cartoonish are Panty and Stocking themselves. Terao's daughter is a big Panty and Stocking fan and while his life is terrible after they save him from a vomit monster, they give him an autograph for her birthday. This episode to me reads as a meta theme expressing the value of silly and non-mundane series like Panty and Stocking and expresses it beautifully to me. Panty and Stocking despite being full of vices are representations of something metaphysical that brings color and joy to the painful life of people with normal or bad lives. These breaks from reality present us with something enchanting that make all the more tolerable. I can very well understand why someone might rank this ep low because it's almost nothing like most episodes, but I love this episode. All the eps below I might thoroughly enjoy, including Episode 6, but these top 3 including 5B are episodes that excite me to think about and talk about. Episode 6 is great, but it's great in a lot of conventional ways. 5B is something that even if it's not unique perse, it's so much more distinct and says so much more I am not used to hearing.  

2: Episode 13A- "Bitch Girls": The emotional climax of the series, Bitch Girls has maybe my favorite moment in the entire series. After losing her confidence and being reverted to a virgin, unable to achieve intimacy with Brief in the prior ep, Panty starts this ep absolutely disgusted by sex the thing that used to be her obsession. She temporarily mentally reverts to an innocent shy persona, but after regaining her confidence despite reduced to the status of a mortal woman, walking up to Corset and the Daemon Sisters, refusing to be intimidated by them giving an amazing speech about not being defined by their arbitrary rules. She then engages in loving intimacy with Brief, far more powerful then any she's ever had as he becomes her paradoxical 1,000th and first, the sexual re-awakening reigniting her Angel Powers. It was for a long time a rather painful trope that for a woman losing her virginity was somehow a diminishment of who she was, one of a million arbitrary rules. To me this is the heart of Panty and Stocking as a series, what I took from it, that you shouldn't led stupid arbitrary terms and rules others give you limit who you are but should instead live freely. Panty not just being not diminished but having her Angel Powers, representing in Magical Girl Terms her feminine power awakened from loving intimacy returning her to the badass Angel Heroine she is was an amazing moment and to me is the pinnacle of Panty's character. Similar to the difference between 3A and 6, 5B is an episode that I love to think about, but it's an episode that is amazing in isolation, something you wouldn't even have to watch another episode to get. 13A is an episode that is the culmination of the series and Panty Anarchy as a character.

1: Episode 9B- "Ghost: The Phantom of Daten City": I said 13A has maybe my favorite moment in the entire series. That's because while it has Panty's peak as a character, 9B has Stocking's peak as a character. In this episode Stocking falls in love with a ghost, one who's disgusting both physically and in personality. To save her from him Panty prepares to kill him, only for it to be revealed that the Bachelor Ghost really did love Stocking and in knowing the love of another, is finally able to rest in peace. This is the only time one of the Angels saves a ghost instead of destroying them. It's said that when the production staff made this episode, they weren't sure were to laugh or be moved, and that feeling is incredible. This episode is looking at the common trope in media aimed at women, of the attractive guy with a dark side, that he can be redeemed by a loving woman's heart. It's kind of parodying it, making all the romantic gestures purposefully gross, making the bachelor's ghost exterior as repulsive as his actions. Yet at the same time it recognizes the impulse behind this trope, that archetypally feminine desire to heal a broken soul, to free a heart lost in darkness, is a noble one, and a beautiful part of love. So even as they break it down, play it for laughs, they make it all the more impactful when the Bachelor Ghost even in his stupid gross ways tries to genuinely show his love for Stocking. This to me is the peak of Stocking's character, the cynical snarky goth girl experiencing innocent love for someone who seems to not deserve it in all ways and that impossible paradoxical love, something that seems so absurd it must be a joke, reflects something beautiful about humanity. 13A and 9B are both fantastic eps and reflect the peak of Panty and Stocking as characters, but I feel 9B is a bit more focused and a bit more unique. 

Poll for my Audience about next Death Analysis

 So it's been a while since I made a Death Analysis or Death Prediction. I'm going to be totally honest, it was a combination of lack of motivation mixed with the fact that some of the sources for Hello Kitty are impossible to find. So I wanted to present my audience with three possibilities:

A: Make a blog using just the sources I can find

B: Make a blog on a specific version

C: Put it on the backburner for now and move on to my next Death Prediction

The benefit of A is that it will be something of a return to normality, the downside is that it will take another month or two

The benefit of B is finally getting this off my plate and getting a cute fun short blog, the downside is it will absolutely not be comprehensive 

The benefit of C is I can get right to work on the next project, the downside is obviously I don't know when the Kitty blog will be finished. 

Answer Here if you feel like

Ranking the Justice League using just their First Issue

I've seen and done several versions of this but I really felt like doing another, particularly with probably the world's most famous superhero team. This is a ranking of who'd win in a Battle Royale of the Justice League using just their first issues. This will be the 7 Classic Founding Members of the Justice League: Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, The Barry Allen Flash, and the Hal Jordan Green Lantern. I'm going to go over each first and then how I would rank them

Superman first appeared in Action Comics #1 in April 1938

The very first page of the story introduces Superman's powers, showing him leaping 1/8th of a mile and over buildings, lifting steel bars with one hand, running faster than an express train and it being stated that nothing less than a bursting shell can penetrate his skin

The next notable feats of his are easily tearing down a steel door and tanking a bullet from a pistol

Later, Superman easily catches up to a speeding car and smashes it, including lifting it with one hand:

Superman also shows some scientific knowledge, specifically on how electrical wires to be sat on, unless you are grounded in some way

Those are all of his biggest feats. At one point in the story Superman in his civilian disguise Clark Kent does take a normal train which suggests either it was faster than him (unlikely as he can specifically run faster than an express train) or more likely that at this point he did not have the stamina to run that fast for as long as he needed too

Batman was the second Justice League Member to appear, his first comic being Detective Comics 27 in March 1939

As opposed to Superman who is introduced by his powers and that he helps people in need, Batman is introduced to us as an adventurous crime fighter suggesting combat skill

We first see the Batman in action where he sometimes to demonstrate stealth skills, getting close to two criminals on the roof without them noticing. He demonstrates some combat skill with a headlock, knocking out criminal with one blow and throwing the other over his shoulder

Batman demonstrates quick thinking plugging a deadly gas jet with a handkerchief and breaking out of a glass chamber with a mighty blow

Finally Batman demonstrates more speed and strength tackling the armed Jennings before Jennings can shoot him and apprehending him before explaining Stryker's plot showing his detective skills. He also demonstrates his stealth skill again

Wonder Woman is the third of the Justice League Members to appear, first appearing in All-Star Comics #8 in October 1941

Wonder Woman is introduced as 100 times the agility and strength the best male athletes and wrestlers with the loveliness of Aphrodite, wisdom of Athena, speed of Mercury, and strength of Hercules. 

over two pages told mostly in Prose the Story expresses the Amazons as a race of Warrior Women since Ancient Greece and their story, with Hippolyta mentioning to Diana that she was taught all the modern sciences and languages as well as those of ancient times

Princess Diana of the Amazons in disguises engages in competition with the other Amazons to find the strongest and wisest of their number with Diana winning, demonstrates the speed to surpass that of a deer and blocking bullets at close range with her bracelets

The Fourth Justice League Member to appear only a month was Aquaman in More Fun Comics #73 in November 1941

Aquaman is introduced as "like the water gods of old" to dwell in the depths of the oceans

Some Nazis fire a gun at a lifeboat at a boat carrying refugees and hospital workers. "The very instant" the gun fires, Aquaman "whips" the boat forward, avoiding the bullet

Aquaman easily leaps onto the boat deck and physically defeats one of the Nazis though is not fast enough to stop the other from going below deck. He also demonstrates the ability to speak porpoises in their own language

Aquaman gives his backstory where his father, an undersea explorer discovered Atlantis and used their technology to adapt Aquaman to the sea such that he can "live and thrive" underwater. He is stated to swim faster than any racing craft or deadly gale. 

Aquaman strikes the Submarine his strength indenting the metal and causing the submarine to sink

Aquaman withstands the tons of water pressure which the story tells us is fatal to any normal being (despite fish being clearly right next to him.) Aquaman's eyes are described as keen and he his knowledge of deep sea plants to send a signal to his porpoise allies. After being freed, Aquaman moves with the narration caption calling him a human torpedo

He does have something of an anti-feat, namely that he is knocked unconscious from having a hammer dropped on his head from above

The Fifth Justice League Member to appear is Martian Manhunter who first appears in Detective Comics 255 in November 1955

John Jones is introduced as "The Super-Detective from Outer Space"

The story informs us he is secretly J'onn Jonzz of Mars, stranded on Earth. His powers are first seen starting with his super-sight that lets him see air bubbles deep underwater of a drowning diver. He assumes his Martian Form which is naturally invisible. He swims fast enough to create an air pocket for the diver to gain his breath back and swim back to the surface. He then whirls about rapidly, churning up "tons" of water to create a division for his attempted assassins

J'onn uses his super breath to direct some lions against some killers rather then their assassination target. It is established that fire is his weakness

To get out of the way of the erupting volcano as well as get to the target he uses x-ray vision to scan for the assassins and phase through the mountain he's climbing. He also uses his eyes to convert the rays of the sun into searing energy vision that melts the snow on the mountain and uses a flood of water to knock down the assassins

The Sixth Member of the Justice League to appear is Barry Allen, the Second Flash. He first appeared in Showcase #4 in October 1956 

We are introduced to him as the "fastest man alive" who "not only outraced his shadow but also broke the sound barrier -- on foot!" Which I'm gonna be honest is pretty weird since you'd think outracing one's shadow would be a more impressive feat

The Flash is once described as breaking the sound barrier and with his speed increasing

We then get a very meta backstory for the Flash as he reads the adventures of the Golden Age Flash as a comic book character before lightning strikes near him and douses him in the chemicals on the shelf near him, which he endures without effect though what these chemicals are is unknown so I can't say if this is an endurance feat of any kind

Barry sees a tripping waitress moving so slowly that she appears frozen and is stated to move at "immeasurable speed" as he helps her

Barry then sees a bullet headed towards Iris, this one is clearly moving from his perspective and he doesn't have forever to get Iris out of the way though it's still moving in relative slow motion

Barry is a scientist so creates a ring that produces his costume for him at a moment's notice showing his intelligence

Barry once again cracks the sound barrier with the Comic drawing emphasis on it along with running down the side of a building

There is a part where The Turtle tricks The Flash using a painted silhouette to make him thing a shadow is there which might be what the first page is meant to be referring to though doesn't really fit the description. The Flash's speed is high enough he burrows into the wall like a drill

The Flash for some reason tries to use a speedboat to catch up to the Turtle and is described as moving at mind-stagging speed

The Flash runs after him so fast he runs on the water but his own feet motions pushes the Turtle's boat at the same speed. So he runs around the boat at supersonic speed making a vortex capturing the Turtle. 

The Final of the Founding Justice League Members to debut was Hal Jordan, the Second Green Lantern, first appearing in Showcase #22 in October 1959. He has a bit more content then the others as while most of them were one story in a comic of numerous stories, with each of the others having some between half a dozen pages to a dozen pages, Hal had basically an entire issue to himself. 

We are introduced to Hal Jordan, Ace Test Pilot who is absolutely fearless, his pilot trainer being drawn to an area by the green light of the Lantern

The Alien Abin Sur has crashed on Earth and has a duty to pass on his "Battery of Power" to a worthy earthman, one who is "entirely without fear" and creates a bolt of pure energy which crosses the Earth at the speed of light, summoning Hal to his location

Abin Sur explains he is a "patrolmen of the supergalactic system" and uses his Green Ring to assess Hal for honesty

Abin Sur also explains that the Green Lantern Ring has a Yellow Impurity and so is powerless over yellow things

On the last page of the first story in the issue we see another weakness as well as a large power feat as the dying Abin Sur tells Hal the Ring is charged for 24 hours at a time before needing to be recharged at the battery. Hal tests his new powers by raising a cliff. He states that anything he wills he can do with the ring.

This is about the amount of content the other characters got, but Hal has two more stories this issue.

The Plane known as "The Flaming Spear"' has its controls frozen. Green Lantern flies out "like a javelin of light", grips the plane with his green energy, and lands it safely

Green Lantern scans the plane for outside interference, finding an outside radiation that was affecting it. The trail goes cold but he uses his knowledge that radiation always moves in a straight line to continue

Green Lantern phases through a wall, and when shot at simply causes the bullets to explode in midair like firecrackers. Also there's a pretty funny joke

However one throws a Yellow Lantern which Green Lantern obviously can't stop because his Ring can't affect yellow things and actually substantially affects him, seemingly knocking him out. When he comes to his senses, he easily catches up to their car but can't affect it because it's yellow

Green Lantern turns his energy into ice picks to puncture the car's black tires and turns his energy into a lasso to bind the criminals

The last part of the second story and the start of the third story are focused on Hal's romance with Carol Ferris. However the action resumes when Hal notices a missile directed as the city. Hal tries to stop it but can't because its yellow. Fortunately the tip is red so Hal attempts to create a net to stop it. The missile bends his net but it doesn't break and Hal successfully catches the missile

Green Lantern scans an area finding an underground compound. He again shows his phasing power and turns a battering ring into a stream of water. Also possibly a reference to the Golden Age Green Lantern being unable to affect wood instead of yellow

So those are the founding Justice League Members using just the feats in their first issues. As general statlines:

Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and the Flash are wall level physically. Batman is upper human level while Martian Manhunter and Green Lantern both lack physical feats but might be superhuman in durability just from enduring high speed movement with both having much higher attack potency due to Martian Manhunter's eye beams and Green Lantern's energy constructs. 

Batman is upper human tier speed physically. The rest are superhuman to some regard with Superman, Aquaman's swim speed and Green Lantern's flight speed being subsonic. The Flash is the speedster at confirmed supersonic speeds with one highball interpretation at relativistic to faster than light. However Wonder Woman and Green Lantern can both react to bullets after they are fired and Aquaman has an odd feat of pushing a boat out of the way of a bullet, but it's not known he started to push it, so it might just be dramatic timing that he pushed it out of the way at the last second. 

Beyond this Batman and Wonder Woman both have combat skill feats and all of them demonstrates at least some level of above average intelligence. 

I wanna start by comparing the characters whose powers are mostly just their enhanced stats: Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and to a lesser extent The Flash.

Comparing them in terms of raw strength and durability:

Superman in terms of raw strength is able to leap a tall building in a single bound. A calc made here suggests a figure of 96 Kilojoules. The source uses a mass of 101 kilograms which if is real comes from outside the issue. Using more standard masses of 70-75 kilograms for an adult man gives between 67 Kilojoules and 71 Kilojoules. It's also stated that nothing less then a bursting shell can stop him, but such is a relatively vague statement that while probably impressive is hard to quantify.

Wonder Woman is stated to be 100 times the strength of the best athletes. The world record for is 1008 joules thought this was substantially after the story was written. Still, professional heavyweight boxers can very often reach 700 joules in their punches so somewhere between 70 Kilojoules and 100 Kilojoules would be roughly Wonder Woman's level at this point

Aquaman's feats seem a bit more contradictory in that he is able to survive the pressure of deep underwater which the story makes a big deal of but is knocked out by a hammer dropped on his head. The two possibilities are either that he is much less durable when surprised or that he is specifically weaker outside the water. This is true for Aquaman in general, but isn't stated in the story though might arguably be implied by him being a human that "lives and thrives in the water." His feat of surviving the pressure of the deep ocean is hard to assess as it's not stated how deep he is, only that he has "tons of water pressure on all sides" The story does say he falls into an extinct undersea volcano. Undersea volcanos typically range from being hundreds of meters deep to several kilometers deep. Every ten meters you go underwater increases the pressure by one atmosphere so using 200 meters for the shallowest of undersea volcanos, it should be 21 times the pressure of surface level. The pressure of atmosphere is just over 0.1 joules per cubic centimeter. 21 times that would be 2.1 joules per cubic centimeter. Using the same 70-75 kilogram measure for an adult American male suggests a volume of 70,000-75,000 cubic centimeters gives a value of 147 Kilojoules to 157.5 Kilojoules for his whole body durability. This number is lowballed from using the shallowest possible depth, though also is the durability of his whole body at once not accounting for the focusing effect of something like a strike. For comparison the human surface area is about 18,000 square centimeters, while a fist, the amount of energy that would receive a punch is about 50 square centimeters. 

The Flash's feat is more simple, he plows into a brick wall like a gigantic drill. Using average male height of 1.7 meters tall we can estimate the indent as similarly tall. The width is not quite the same and the depth he penetrated into the wall is not clear, though evidentially the wall didn't collapse. Assuming he indented his whole body into the wall it would be indenting the same 70,000-75,000 cubic centimeters into the brick wall with red brick having a violent fragmentation value of 2.81-5.56 joules per cubic centimeter giving a range of 196.7 kilojoules to 423.75 kilojoules. That said this is once again the energy of his entire body, with the incident knocking him out temporarily. 

For Speed Comparison:

Superman's speed was given by the earlier calculations as between 27 and 50 meters per second from being faster than a locomotive as well as calculating the speed of propulsion of his legs during his jump as 46 meters per second however this uses his height not given in this issue specifically, using the 1.7 meters figure. Keeping everything else the same would give a speed of 42 meters per second. 

Wonder Woman outpaces a deer with most deer reaching speeds of roughly 15-18 meters per second which would be her leg speed. Mala shoots at Diana five times at what the narration describes as "point blank" which the pictures depicts as being several meters away. The nature of the guns are unspecified but the comic notes how the Amazons have more advanced technology than man's world, 1940's small arm fire regularly exceeding 250 meters per second. A quick estimate put the distance at 3.55 meters, meaning the timeframe is 0.0142 seconds. Assuming Mala shot somewhere near Diana's shoulder as Diana did to Mala and she had to move her bracelet to block it that suggested Diana had to move her bracelet roughly the span of her arm which on average for women is 61-66 centimeters giving speeds of roughly 42-45 meters per second

For Aquaman he is stated to swim faster then any racing craft would have included speedboats with speedboats regularly reaching speeds of of 52 meters per second. He has other speed feats but this is the fastest. 

Finally, the Flash is the simplest. He explicitly can break the sound barrier and regularly does. He is also said to keep increasing in speed after doing so, and the original caption describes him outracing his shadow. This would be somewhat inconsistent though with bullets still noticeably moving to the Flash. 

Comparing the four how do I think they do? 

Well I think if Aquaman's inconsistent showings are based even this early on him being in vs out of water, then since the fight would probably take place outside of water, the other three would win. That does kinda seem unfair to him since all his powers in the first issue revolve around water but on the other hand putting it in the water is unfair for him as it's a specific battlefield he is at the strongest and the other three would be hampered in the movements. Inside of water he might be the strongest. His speed feat is faster than either Superman's or Wonder Woman's, and there's no suggestion that underwater Flash can swim at the same speed as he can run, though an interesting fight might be Aquaman in the water with Flash running atop it.

Comparing the others, Superman can run roughly 2-3 times the speed of Wonder Woman but her reaction/attack speed seems easily enough to react and tag him. The Flash is substantially faster than both, by several times over. That said the Flash would basically have to ram either Superman or Wonder Woman with his whole body to try and directly harm him or they would just tank his blows, and the knockback force would likely knock him out giving Superman or Wonder Woman the chance to tag him. The Flash could try to create a vortex around them, but even if he succeeds in dazing them it's questionable if he could take them down with a surprise punch. I could maybe seem him doing so to Wonder Woman but Superman's body is especially durable with it taking a bursting artillery shell to penetrate his skin and bullets being tanked. I don't see Flash being able to realistically hurt him.

In a fight between Superman and Wonder Woman specifically, Diana might actually have greater physical strength and definitely has far greater combat skill being the best fighter of her people, a race of immortal amazons existing since the time of Ancient Greece. The real question is if Diana has enough raw attack potency to hurt Superman which really depends how durable you think Superman's bursting shell statement requires him to be. 

The other three fighters have more unique strategies. Batman is at a real disadvantage here. Not only does he not have powers, but his original story is the shortest at 6 pages. I thought his first story might have some weapon that at such a power level relatively speaking might be a significant advantage. Unfortunately he really doesn't show any.  His best asset here is really his stealth ability and if he gets the drop on Hal Jordan, Martian Manhunter, or Aquaman out of the water based on a hammer dropping him then he might be able to take them out. That said in an open fight he'd lose to anyone else here just from lacking abilities and stats.

The final two are quite interesting. Green Lantern is "powerless" against anything yellow, but he shows twice in the first story alone he can still affect the non-yellow part of things. While everyone here except and ironically J'onn wear yellow, usually it's only a small part on them and so would affect Hal if he tried to push their entire body at once or something like that. Assuming that they were to fight each other, and both went intangible my presumption would be that J'onn would win because Hal has a time limit, albeit a very large 24 hour one on his Power Ring before he runs out of power while J'onn as far as can be seen from the first issue can just stay intangible as long as needed.

Assuming they were to fight otherwise, it's a bit hard to say. Green Lantern has higher showings of energy output and flight so you'd assume he'd win. That said neither show any substantial durability feats so J'onn could just as easily kill him via his eye-vision. The other thing J'onn can do is go intangible and while Green Lantern can scan for him, if he doesn't know J'onn is there in the first J'onn could potentially get the jump on him. Hal also has transmutation but once again it's not a matter of killing each other if they get a hit in, it's just the first hit wins. 

Comparing either Green Lantern or Martian Manhunter against one of the first four Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, or The Flash it really just depends on if the former two get blitzed as if they go intangible they basically just win but they probably can't take a hit from them. 

So going to do my best at ranking them. This isn't so much who can beat everyone below them but who has the best chance against the other 6 on average. 

7: Batman: Having the least content and meant to be a normal human doesn't help him. He can defeat a lower estimate Aquaman or defeat the characters with more human level durability via surprise attacks but he is similarly helpless as most people against Hal or J'onn if they turn intangible and has no way of hurting Clark or Diana at least. 

6: Aquaman (assuming the fight is on land): If you take a lower estimate where his powers come from the water then Batman would beat him too. That's not really said but even looking at his feats while his swimming speed is the second fastest speed of characters here, it doesn't translate to his land speed and his physical feats are only nebulously in the same range as Clark or Diana. Clark, Diana, or Barry could likely speedblitz while Hal and J'onn can likely beat him at range.

This is where things get particularly hard as I think Superman and Wonder Woman can beat the Flash, but the Flash has the best chance of blitzing Hal and J'onn, with Hal and J'onn being large threats to Clark and Diana via energy projection, intangibility and general hax,

5: Wonder Woman: So I think Wonder Woman would have a decent matchup against Superman and Flash. Her strength statement is arguably more impressive then Superman's, though Superman's is definitely more casual and his durability is high enough that even with her skill advantage Diana might struggle against him just trying to put Superman down. Against The Flash via her large skill advantage she might be able to tag him but the Flash might be able to hurt with his strikes and even if he doesn't, with the speed gap and scientific knowledge might be able to do something like poison her depending on where they are. In both cases it's at least contested. 

Conversely due to her relatively low movement speed and lack of movement options, she would have serious trouble against Green Lantern and Martian Manhunter who can maintain distance with greater speed (And flight in Green Lantern's case) and ping at her with attacks stronger then her. Even if she gets close they could simply turn intangible there's nothing she could do. Unless she starts at melee she basically can't win against those two.

4: The Flash: So I think the Flash has a good shot at beating Hal or Martian Manhunter but it's not like an incredible shot or anything. If Hal starts in the air, then the only thing Flash can do is make a vortex and as ace pilot, you'd think Hal would have some mental resistance to that. Plus he has phasing and lightspeed attacks that hit a wide area. Against Manhunter if he gets a hit in sure he'll win but if J'onn is invisible he would have to find him which might not work if J'onn can see him coming with super vision and if J'onn phases intangible Flash still can't beat him. Plus against Superman it's arguable where Flash can even put him down given Superman's durability and Flash has a worse matchup against the lower characters then anyone prior possibly losing to a stealth-ed Batman (Or Martian Manhunter), and with Wonder Woman possibly tagging him. I don't wanna disrespect just how fast he is here, he is definitely at least here but I don't think higher.

3: Superman: So Superman vs Martian Manhunter I feel like so long as Superman doesn't start at melee Range Martian Manhunter should be fast enough to go intangible and probably would against someone as obviously physically imposing as the fast moving muscular Superman. At this point MMH can simply use his eye vision to whittle him down safely. Hal is similar except with the added advantages of flying (Superman could leap at him but that would give Hal time to phase intangible) and clearly knowing who Superman is in his own story. I initially Superman higher but phasing is just a very strong ability and I don't think he can blitz either of the two phasers unless they start close range.

The last two were tricky but I eventually decided

2: Green Lantern

1: Martian Manhunter

Both these characters have relatively similar superspeed and both have phasing meaning I think it would be very hard in most cases for them to hurt each other. That said I think J'onn has a few advantages

1: His super vision and invisibility means he's more likely to get the drop on Hal

2: J'onn seems more likely to use his powers subtly and efficiently in character. Hal is characterized as something of a hot shot while J'onn is depicted as being fairly quiet and rational as a detective

3: If Hal found out that J'onn's weakness is fire he could probably win but the same could arguably be said for J'onn figuring out Hal's weakness and of the two J'onn seems the more observant type

So overall I think the Martian Manhunter would be the most likely to win if the Justice League got into a battle royale using just the feats of their first issue. I attribute this to his versatility and flexibility. It wasn't from being the best in a category it came from having strong offensive abilities in his eye vision, strong defensive abilities in his phasing and invisibility, and strong utility abilities in his super speed, super vision, and general intelligence/rationing ability. He was definitely the midpoint of all these Heroes and their capabilities.

This was a fun blog to do and if people are interested maybe sometime I'll do a Team Trial with this specific grouping of Justice League